The happiest retirees have these things in common

“One of my lines is, ‘If you don’t work hard in retirement, retirement’s going to be hard,’” he says.

Putt and ponder

“There are so many things that you need to do. You need to be physically active – golf isn’t enough – you need to get a sweat up, at least every day. You need to work on balance. You need to work on the structure of your day, your morning routines. Those sorts of things tend to go out the window when you don’t have work.”

Winward considers his work to inhabit the world of goal setting. Over the course of a golf round, he will work with clients to figure out what they’re trying to achieve in their lives, while also taking a read of how strong their social connections are.

The golf course, he argues, is the perfect place for this kind of work. It’s less confrontational than sitting across from a counsellor – something many 50- or 60-year-old men would be averse to doing to begin with. Plus, clients have the chance to gather their thoughts, or reflect on a question while moving between holes or practising their swing.

“I believe in the link between the physical and the mental. It’s very simple, walking gets them talking. It gets rid of the power dynamic of the counsellor being the expert … and it gives us a good solid two hours together, where the pressure is off.”

In the year or so that he’s focused on this age group, he’s observed the same problem as the healthcare and superannuation system: Australians haven’t quite nailed the whole retirement thing – and it’s a tough nut to crack.

‘Just’, ‘trust’ and ‘rust’ friends

New research by fund Colonial First State finds that 48 per cent of retirees over 65 who haven’t received financial advice say they aren’t enjoying their retirement. This falls to 23 per cent of advised retirees.

And unadvised retirees are twice as likely (28 per cent) to find retirement harder than expected, compared to advised retirees (12 per cent).

But separate research by Macquarie University psychology professor and leading retirement expert Joanne Earl suggests it goes beyond financial planning. Instead, holistic planning – which includes building strategies to maintain financial, social, mental, emotional and physical health – is required.

The problem is too few people think about what retirement will look like. Someone who retires at 67 and lives to 87 will have 7300 days. In all likelihood, says Winward, they’re not going to play 5000 rounds of golf (one a fortnight).

So, discipline comes in the form of diversifying both activities and friendship groups.

An 85-year study by Harvard University that tracked 724 men who were teenagers in 1938 found that connection was one of the two biggest drivers of retirement happiness. The other driver was knowing how to let go of past failures, and instead run towards the hobbies that made them happy.

Winward says he often hears from male clients leaving the corporate world that most of their friends are friends from work. When they stop working, they find that they need more friends.

“We’ve got some language around friendship groups. We’ve got our ‘just friends’ who are those friends from work. The ones where you’ll walk down the street and say, ‘John, how are you going? We should have that coffee.’ Five years later, it’s, ‘John, we’ve really got to get that coffee.’”

The next group is your ‘trust friends’, who include your closest friends and loved ones that you trust and consider confidantes. The final group is your ‘rust friends’, or those that you’ve lost contact with.

“The group that I focus on a lot is emerging friends, and how to create new friendships. Those water cooler conversations that you have at work might not seem important, but when that’s all gone, who are you socialising with?”

The other question he wants pre-retirees to ask themselves is whether they even want to retire, or just want to quit their job. It’s not uncommon for him to meet people who feel stuck in their line of work, and see no way out other than retirement.

“Changing up your career is a great idea. And ask the question: what’s your passion – can you turn that into some form of work? It doesn’t have to be every day, but it’s got to give you structure. It’s got to give you enjoyment, and it’s got to be hard enough that you’re pushing your brain and body.”